Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Will German support for Ukraine decrease after the early elections on February 23, 2025?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Corbin Burnes To Undergo Tommy John Surgery - MLB Trade Rumors

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I see through liars

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Do you think President-Elect Donald Trump won the presidency fair and square, or do you think the GOP resorted to blatant unlawful practices to tilt the election?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Doctors Say You Might Be Eating Way Too Much Salt — Here’s How To Tell - BuzzFeed

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

ADA Issues New MASLD Guidelines - Medscape

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know who the president of Turkey really is

What happens in Sweden if you cannot pay a hospital debt you did not know about until recently but willing to pay when your finances improve?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have complete contempt for traitorism

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

You're more likely to be struck by lightning than the Pacers were to win their playoff comebacks - NBC News

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t cotton to rapists

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Presidential Message on National Men’s Health Week, 2025 - The White House (.gov)

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

South Africa Is Rising Up Out of The Ocean, Scientists Reveal - ScienceAlert

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

2025 NBA Finals: 4 things to watch for in Game 3 - NBA

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

What is the story behind bhai dooj?

I have complete contempt for fakery

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I can count

Ryan Blaney hits right notes in Nashville, lands first Cup Series win of season - NASCAR.com

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I can read

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I actually pay taxes

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I understand how hurricane paths work

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t buy bullshit

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.